always watching

always watching
chevy stevens
thriller/mystery/suspense
st. martin's press
published 2013

She helps people put their demons to rest.

But she has a few of her own....

In the lockdown ward of a psychiatric hospital, Dr. Nadine Lavoie is in her element.  She has the tools to help people, and she has the desire - healing broken families is what she lives for.  But Nadine doesn't want to look too closely at her own past because there are whole chunks of her life that are black holes.  It takes all her willpower to tamp down her recurrent claustrophobia, and her daughter, Lisa, is a runaway who has been on the streets for seven years.

When a distraught woman, Heather Simeon, is brought into the Psychiatric Intensive Care Unit after a suicide attempt, Nadine gently coaxes her story out of her - and learns of some troubling parallels with her own life.  Digging deeper, Nadine is forced to confront her traumatic childhood, and the damage that began when she and her brother were brought by their mother to a remote commune on Vancouver Island.  What happened to Nadine?  Why was their family destroyed?  And why does the name Aaron Quinn, the group's leader, bring complex feelings of terror to Nadine even today?

Note:  I finished this book over a week ago and I've been so distracted with other things I haven't gotten around to reviewing which bugs me because I like to review books when they're still fresh in my mind so please excuse the shortness of my review!

I was incredibly disappointed with Always Watching.  After Still Missing I went to Never Knowing and that was a disappointment.  But Always Watching was even worse than Never Knowing (which I didn't hate, but I really didn't care for Sara).

Nadine was the worst character in a book with terrible characters.  I felt no sympathy for anyone except for maybe Willow and Heather who are fleeting in this novel.  I couldn't relate to anyone and I don't think even Chevy Stevens did.  The writing felt stifled and amateur, nothing like Still Missing.  It's very sad.

I still have That Night sitting on my bookshelf.  I'm keeping my fingers crossed...

cross my heart

cross my heart
alex cross #21
james patterson
mystery/suspense
little brown & co
published 2013

Detective Alex Cross is a family man at heart -- nothing matters more to him than his children, his grandmother, and his wife Bree.  His love of his family is his anchor, and gives him the strength to confront evil in his work.  One man knows this deeply, and uses Alex's strength as a weapon against him in the most unsettling and unexpected novel of James Patterson's career.

When the ones Cross loves are in danger, he will do anything to protect them.  If he does anything to protect them, they will die.

This review will contain spoilers.

I find it slightly humorous that the synopsis talks about how much Alex Cross loves his kids and his family, but the truth is, he may love them but he has no time for them.  Damon is calling his father, something obviously wrong, but Alex brushes him off.  Jannie is pissed because he never makes it to any of her school events and they're letting 7-year-old Ali watch The Walking Dead.  Are you kidding me?

Nothing of interest happens for 80% of the book.  I looked on my Kindle when stuff started happening.  There is a case going on but it's resolved and you know there's a bigger thing going on.  And when it got to that point I thought it sucked that it was going to get wrapped up so quickly.

But he didn't.  He left us hanging.  For the first time that I can remember James Patterson wrote an Alex Cross novel with a cliffhanger.  So I can't really judge the book on the first 80% because that was useless.  So I'm reserving my review until I read the next book.

the cruelest month

the cruelest month
armand gamache #3
louise penny
st. martin's minotaur
published 2008

Welcome to Three Pines, where the cruelest month is about to deliver on its threat.

It's spring in the tiny, forgotten village; buds are on the trees and the first flowers are struggling through the newly thawed earth.  But not everything is meant to return to life....When some villagers decide to celebrate Easter with a seance at the Old Hadley House, they are hoping to rid the town of its evil - until one of their party dies of fright.  Was this a natural death, or was the victim somehow helped along?

Brilliant, compassionate Chief Inspector Armand Gamache of the Sûreté du Québec is called to investigate, in a case that will force him to face his own ghosts as well as those of a seemingly idyllic town where relationships are far more dangerous than they seem.

Finally!  The Arnot case, which has been hinted at throughout the last two books has been revealed in its entirety and Armand's betrayers are exposed at last.  That's not to say the repercussions of the case are not over, but at least everything seems to be out in the open and as a reader I'm no longer wondering what it was all about.

I really want to go to Three Pines.  Even though in these three books a murder has occurred in this tiny town, it still sounds beautiful and charming.  The characters are rich and so full of life you can picture them clearly in your head.  There is so much more going on in the story than the murder Gamache and his team are investigating.

In the first books I wasn't the biggest fan of Peter Morrow, but with Clara I find myself rooting for her the most.  I think it's because Clara is truly good and honest and loves Peter absolutely.  Despite her own insecurities with her art she wants Peter to succeed.  Peter, on the other hand, while I don't doubt that he loves Clara seems to go out of his way to sabotage his wife's success.  And even when he feels guilty about it he does nothing to fix what he has broken.  I wonder if this will come back to haunt them in books to follow.

Penny has a way of weaving a murder mystery that keeps you from knowing the killer until she is ready to reveal that person.  It doesn't come out of left field like some authors write or become so obvious that you don't even care to read the rest of the book.  She just keeps you guessing until the end.

every secret thing

every secret thing
laura lippman
fiction/mystery
william morrow
published 2003

Two little girls banished from a neighborhood birthday party take a wrong turn down an unfamiliar Baltimore street and encounter an abandoned stroller with an infant inside.  What happens next is shocking and terrible, and three families are irreparably destroyed.  

Seven years later, Alice Manning and Ronnie Fuller, now eighteen, are released from "kid prison" to begin their lives over again.  But the secrets swirling around the original crime continue to haunt the parents, the lawyers, the police - all the adults in Alice and Ronnie's lives.  And now another child has disappeared, under freakishly similar circumstances.

There was hardly a redeemable character in this book.  Alice and Ronnie, Alice's mother, her defense attorney, the young reporter, even the baby's mother.  None had qualities I found I could relate to or root for.  Near the end I found myself feeling sorry for Ronnie who seemed to have been screwed over the most.  For some reason the two I disliked the most were Alice and Cynthia, the mother of the baby in the stroller.  At first it was because who leaves her baby on her front porch unattended?  Then when that was explained I still couldn't find any sympathy for her because she just seemed like such a terrible person.  And who's to say that I wouldn't react the same way she did if that were my situation?  I probably would.

I did find the detective Nancy to be a genuinely good person who kind of got the short end of the stick in her rookie days.

But all in all the book was relatively disappointing to me.  Everyone got away!  The one who deserved redemption paid the price for all the idiots.  Some things I didn't understand the point of.  Mira's character?  Annoying and unnecessary.  And then she gets rewarded in the end?  When she didn't even have a story?  It was all so pointless.  I didn't need a happy ending, but I did want a justified one.

i like it like that

i like it like that
gossip girl #5
cecily von ziegesar
poppy
published 2008

It's spring break and love is in the air.  Or is that a blend of Chanel no. 9 and Gucci Rush?  Is there a difference?  Blair moves in with Serena and they're back to being best friends.  But will the love-fest last or will they end up tearing out one another's newly highlighted hair?  And speaking of new, Nate is on the straight and narrow, playing Nate-in-shining-armor to his crazy new girlfriend, Georgie.  But he will definitely get more than he bargained for when he, Georgie, Blair, and Serena end up hanging out together in Sun Valley, Idaho.  Back in Manhattan, Jenny is spending time with a mysteriously nice new boyfriend and Dan is spending time crying in the office of the Red Letter literary journal.  And Vanessa, wait, is that Vanessa shopping at Barney's with a guy in a Lacoste shirt?  The long cold winter is over and the sun is finally shining along Fifth Avenue.  The trees are in bloom and NYC's most fabulous are ready for a truly outrageous vacation!

It's funny.  Usually, I read the book before I see the movie, but there haven't been too many book series that TV shows have been based on that I've watched.  Bones is one of them, but those books are so different it's really only the Temperance Brennan character who is the same.  When I do read a book and see the movie I'm inevitably disappointed in how the movie portrayed a character or changed something.  I hardly ever think the movie change was for the better, but in the case of Gossip Girl the changes that were made were mostly for the better in my opinion.

My favorite characters on the TV show were Chuck and Blair.  The only reason why I watched the show after the second season was only because of the two of them.  The rest of them could have all died in a fiery soap opera plane crash and I would have continued watching as long as Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf were still there.  In the end, I didn't even care who Gossip Girl was.  I just care about what happened to Chuck & Blair.

So while I loved them on the show, the book is much different.  Chuck is nowhere near the show Chuck.  He's like first episode Chuck, but much further out there.  Plus, he's a background character that we hardly get to see, much less get into his head.

Still, I find myself drawn to Blair.  I could care less about Nate, Serena, Jenny, Dan or Vanessa.  Their chapters are just annoying interruptions to my Blair story!  Out of those Vanessa is probably most interesting.  Dan is just as ridiculous as he was on the show and even Jenny, who I loved in the It Girl books, is boring.

However, it doesn't matter what I don't like about these books because I still love reading them!  I'll keep reading just in case my Chuck Bass comes back.

cocktails for three

cocktails for three
madeleine wickham
contemporary/chick lit
thomas dunne book
published 2001

At the first of every month, when the office has reached its pinnacle of hysteria, Maggie, Roxanne and Candice meet at London's swankiest bar for an evening of cocktails and gossip.  Here, they chat about what's new in their lives and what's new at The Londoner, the glossy fashion magazine where they all work.  But beneath the girl talk and the laughter, each of the three has something to hide: High-achiever Maggie is pregnant, and terrified at the prospect of becoming a mother; glamorous Roxanne is losing hope that her secret lover will leave his wife; and kindhearted Candice cannot escape the guilty secret that has pursued her since childhood.  What a chance encounter at the cocktail bar sets in motion an extraordinary chain of events, their lives quickly spin out of control and their friendship is stretched to the limit.  Suddenly, Maggie, Roxanne and Candice must face their fears and troubles alone, and it is only a matter of time before one of them snaps...

I bought this book years ago, maybe even when it first came out.  That was when I read Sophie Kinsella's first few books and thought they were great.  Then I read a couple more and realized I hated her books.  So this one sat on my shelf collecting dust.  This year I decided I would make a dent in my shelf.  I would either get rid of the books I wasn't going to read or read them.  So with that in mind I finally started this book.

And I did enjoy it.  I think maybe I just don't like the Shopaholic character.  There were things that drove me nuts about the characters at certain points, but that was because I could see what was coming much better than they could.  No one was over the top crazy (unless they were supposed to be!) and the stories were all believable.  I related most with Maggie, of course.  The reluctant mother who has no idea what she's getting into and then being in way over her head.

But each character brought her own weight to the story.  Despite it taking me so long to finally read and finish this book it was a quick read.  And my only complaint was that not everyone got what was coming to her by the end of the book!

the darkest evening of the year

the darkest evening of the year
dean koontz
suspense/horror/fantasy
bantam
published 2007

Amy Redwing has dedicated her life to the southern California organization she founded to rescue abandoned and endangered golden retrievers.  Among dog lovers, she's a legend for the risks she'll take to save an animal from abuse.  Among her friends, Amy's heedless devotion is often cause for concern.  To widower Brian McCarthy, whose commitment she can't allow herself to return, Amy's behavior is far more puzzling and hides a shattering secret.

No on is surprised when Amy risks her life to save Nickie, nor when she takes the female golden into her home.  The bond between Amy and Nickie is immediate and uncanny.  Even her two other goldens, Fred & Ethel, recognize Nickie as special, a natural alpha.  But the instant joy Nickie brings is shadowed by a series of eerie incidents.  An ominous stranger.  A mysterious home invasion.

And the unmistakable sense that someone is watching Amy's every more and that, whoever it is, he's not alone.

Someone has come back to turn Amy into the desperate, hunted creature sh's always been there to save.  But now there's no one to save Amy and those she loves.

In most of Dean Koontz's recent books I've read there is an autistic or child with Down's and a dog that has some uncanny sort of understanding of humans.  Most of the time I love it, but the way that the child was treated in this book was hard to read.  I mean, really hard to read.

The whole story is very slow.  He's building suspense and trying to lay out the story, but this time it didn't feel suspenseful and when the resolution is coming to and end it happens in about 4 pages.  After 10 years of being tormented by this woman there is no confrontation it's just over.  And the outcome is so 'magical' that I just couldn't get into it.  In the end, I just didn't care who lived and who died.

dust to dust

dust to dust
kovac/liska #2
tami hoag
fiction/mystery/thriller
bantam
published 2000

Sorry.  The single word was written on the mirror.  In front of it hung the body of Andy Fallon, a Minneapolis Internal Affairs cop.  Was it suicide?  Or a kinky act turned tragic accident?  Either way, his death wasn't a crime.  The investigation will be a formality, a duty that veteran Homicide detective Sam Kovac isn't looking forward to.  He doesn't want to spend any more time than he has to in the bleak, empty world of the victim's father, Iron Mike, Kovac's old mentor and a department legend.  It's too much like looking into his own future.  But Kovac has a sixth sense for crime, and it's buring.

Together with his partner, the wisecracking, ambitious Nikki Liska, Kovac begins to dig at the too-neat edges of Fallon's death, uncovering one motive and one suspect after another.  The shadows of suspicion fall deeply not only on the city's power elite, but into the very heart of the police department itself.

While Ashes to Ashes was touted as the first Kovac/Liska book they merely had background roles in the book.  Kovac was present more than Liska was, but not much.  Here in Dust to Dust they are both in the forefront working together, but also separately on two different cases.  Both of them involving the police department.

Kovac's case is personal and he's pretty much the only one who thinks that a crime actually occurred.  Liska is following up on a closed case, much to the irritation of their boss.

There are times when I wonder why Liska makes such dumb choices, or ignores something that any self respecting cop would ignore.  And there are times when Hoag goes off describing something or added a scene that was completely unnecessary.  The book was longer than it should have been and to be honest, there were no surprises anywhere.

Who else could the killer have been?  The players could all only fit into certain roles so the pieces all fit in much faster than I think Hoag was aiming for.  

because i'm worth it

because i'm worth it
gossip girl #4
cecily von ziegesar
ya/romance
poppy
published 2008

Everyone who's anyone in New York City is suffering from post-college-application cabin fever and it's time to run a little wild!  Could it be that Serena is smitten with Blair's stepbrother or will the Fashion Week parties pull her away from any attempt at true love?  Dan & Vanessa are mad about each other and pursuing their creative dreams - but be careful of what you wish for.  Nate hits and all-time low as Blair's Yale interview with a tall, handsome alum takes an unexpected turn and Jenny makes a new friend who gets a little too close for comfort.  And just who is going to get into college early?  Wintertime has never been hotter in NYC as things steam up all over Fifth Avenue.

Reading these while reading the Pretty Little Liars books only highlight how much better Gossip Girl is.  The only mystery around here that's ongoing book by book is who Gossip Girl really is, but that's not a make or break mystery.  We could care less as long as (s)he's dishing the gossip.

For some reason the brand name dropping doesn't get on my nerves as much as it does in PLL.  I think because it's more subtle or appropriate?  In PLL every time someone picks up the same Coach bag Shepard writes 'Hanna picked up her Coach bag...' and then when she subsequently puts it down we read 'Hanna put down her Coach bag...'  Yes, we get it, Hanna has a Coach bag.

But with so many characters who each have a little story and all of them interesting and separate it keeps things fresh.  They're not all chasing after the same thing and I think that's why I don't get tired of these like I have with PLL.

Dan is still a dummy who is, despite his disdain for it, lured by fame and fortune.  Vanessa, more true to herself than just about anyone is more deserving.  Blair is going through some kind of mid-teen crisis and Serena is just page filler.  I swear that girl doesn't have one intelligent thought in her head.  Nate has met Georgina, so look out NYC and Jenny is getting over Nate by hopping the fence?  Maybe?

Either way, I'm delighted and here's to hoping we see more of Chuck Bass because let's face it, Gossip Girl needs Chuck Bass.

the serpent's tale

the serpent's tale
mistress of the art of death #2
ariana franklin
fiction/historical/mystery
putnam adult
published 2008

Since she solved a particularly nasty case of a child murder using her forensic skills, Adelia Aguilar is deemed too valuable to send back to the School of Medicine in Salerno where she was trained.  Instead, King Henry II has decided to keep her in England.  This is bad news for Adelia - in free-thinking Salerno, women doctors are accepted but in twelfth-century England they're unheard of and regarded as witches.  Under suspicion, and with her illegitimate child, Adelia is forced to live and practice in the secrecy of Cambridgeshire's fenland.  But at Henry's court, terrible things are happening.  Out of jealousy, Queen Eleanor of Aquitaine is not only stirring up revolt against her husband, rumor has it that she has also poisoned Fair Rosamund Clifford - the King's favorite mistress.  If Henry believes the stories, England will be torn apart as King battles Queen.  In a race against time to prove that Eleanor is at least innocent of Rosamund's murder, Adelia is recruitd by Rowley, her former lover and father of her child, to help avoid a civil war.  It isn't easy.  An assassin is on the loose and so is Queen Eleanor with a small army.  Adelia encounters both as, in the middle of a terrible medieval winter, she tries to pierce the physical and metaphorical maze that surrounds Rosamund's tower and they mystery of the dead woman who lies frozen inside.

Historical fiction is not my favorite genre.  It's not even my second favorite genre.  In fact, I think I can count on one hand the number of historical fiction books I've read.  Ariana Franklin's Mistress of the Art of Death was a book I read for a book group years ago and I loved it.  The idea of a woman medical examiner back in the twelfth century was fascinating and the murders she was solving were captivating.

This time around I wasn't so enamored with this Mistress.  Adelia is the same, for the most part, but this story wasn't my cup of tea.  Too much talk of kings and queens and treason and plotting and God.  There were so many characters to keep track of I would forget who was who and the way that Franklin cloaks her mystery from the reader makes things confusing at times.  As if I'm missing something.  And I guess I am.  I was frustrated with Rowley and irritated at Adelia's forced citizenship.

Had this been the first book of Adelia I wouldn't have read any more after it.  As it stands I did purchase the third book so I'll probably read that one as well.  Hopefully the case will be more up my alley.

a fatal grace

a fatal grace
armand gamache #2
louise penny
minoaur
published 2007

Welcome to winter in Three Pines, a picturesque village in Quebec, where the villagers are preparing for a traditional country Christmas, and someone is preparing for murder.

No one liked CC de Poitiers.  Not her quiet husband, not her spineless lover, not her pathetic daughter - an certainly none of the residents of Three Pines.  CC de Poitiers managed to alienate everyone, right up until the moment of her death.

When Chief Inspector Armand Gamache, of the Sûreté du Quebec, is called to investigate, he quickly realizes he's dealing with someone quite extraordinary.  CC de Poitiers was electrocuted in the middle of a frozen lake, in front of the entire village, as she watched the annual curling tournament.  And yet no one saw anything.  Who could have been insane enough to try such a macabre method of murder - or brilliant enough to succeed?

With his trademark compassion and courage, Gamache digs beneath the idyllic surface of village life to find the dangerous secrets long buried there.  For a Quebec winter is not only staggeringly beautiful but deadly, and the people of Three Pines know better than to reveal too much of themselves.  But other dangers are becoming clear to Gamache.  As a bitter wind blows into the village, something even more chilling is coming for Gamache himself.

In Still Life I grieved with everyone over the loss of the murdered victim, Jane.  Penny wrote about her in life as well as in the memories of friends and she was someone the small village of Three Pines would miss greatly.  The victim in A Fatal Grace, CC de Poitiers was the exact opposite.  She was awful and there weren't many in the village who were sad to see her go, if anyone.

The murder was intricate, complicated and hard to pull off.  The suspect pool was large, but the number of people who had the means were few.  It made for an interesting story and the return of Nichol was an interesting side story.  But there was a lot going on that the reader isn't really privvy to yet.  It was almost as if the purpose of this book is to set up events that will happen later in the series.  There are many references to the Arnott case, which happened some time before the events in Still Life.

It was a little frustrating.  I don't like reading a book and feeling like I'm missing things, as if I've skipped a book somewhere or am reading something out of order.  So I suppose I should jump right into the next book to see if all my questions are answered.

This story, besides the Arnott stuff, felt pretty unbelievable in the way everything came together at the end.  It was a good mystery, but really a set up for another book.

all i want is everything

all i want is everything
gossip girl #3
cecily von ziegesar
poppy
published 2007

It's Christmastime and Blair and Serena are best friends again and up to their old tricks - partying hard and breaking hearts from Park Avenue to the Caribbean.  Blair's mom and Cyrus are having their honeymoon in Salt Key.  And when school lets out for the holiday, Blair, Serena, Aaron, and company head down there to blow off st  eam after their midterm exams.  In between Pina Coladas and topless sunbathing, Blair and Serena plot revenge on super-jerk Chuck Bass.  Everyone jets back to NYC for Serena's New Year's party, during which Nate and Blair may or may not finally go all the way, and Serena may or may not be discovered to be the secret flung of Hollywood's hottest young leading man.

These are always fun.  Mindless entertainment mostly and since I watched the first few seasons of the show it's fun to compare.  Dan is even more of a douchebag in the books than he was in the show.  I really just don't like him.  I hope he gets better.

Jenny and Nate are still together though that's mostly because Nate's so stoned he really doesn't know what's happening.  I think this might the last Gossip Girl book she's in before she moves on the It Girl (which I loved).  Blair is working on her essay for Yale and Serena is just Serena.

Seriously, there is nothing too hard about these books but they are so much fun!

god-shaped hole

god-shaped hole
tiffanie debartolo
fiction/romance
sourcebooks landmark
published 2002

Tired of the usual dating politics, Beatrice "Trixie" Jordan follows an impulse and replies to a personal ad: "If your intentions are pure, I'm seeking a friend for the end of the world."  In doing so, she meets Jacob Grace, a charming young writer, a passionate seeker of life.  Despite their jaded views of the world, they fall immediately in love.

Trixie and Jacob begin an emotionally charge and tumultuous affair, one they try desperately to keep sacred.  As they struggle to carve out a future beyond the Los Angeles hills, Trixie and Jacob face family secrets that threaten to keep the two close to home ... or at least apart from one another.

Anything less than mad, passionate, extraordinary love is a waste of your time.  There are too many mediocre things in life to deal with and love shouldn't be one of them.

Over a decade ago a movie changed my life.  It sounds so cliche but it is the truth.  Dream For An Insomniac starring Ione Skye & Jennifer Anniston.  I can close my eyes and watch the movie in my head from beginning to end despite having not watched it in several years.  Ione Skye's Frankie was a romantic who would settle for nothing less than what she deemed to be perfect love and I, well I was stuck in a marriage with a man I didn't even like anymore.  Everything in the movie spoke to me.  I was Frankie.  I was certain I wasn't going to settle for anything less than extraordinary love.

So I booked a flight out of Texas and never went back.

Years later I stumbled upon two books written by Tiffanie DeBartolo who wrote that life-changing movie and finally, I've read one.

Every character came to life for me.  I could feel the desperation at the idea of being stuck in their hell forever.  The helplessness when things began to spiral, the content and giddiness when things were on track....it was all so much life it sparked within the pages.

It's hard to articulate how I feel after reading God-Shaped Hole without spoiling the book for anyone who should want to read it and you should want to read it.  DeBartolo has a way with words.  It made me want to write again, to keep a journal, to write everything down.  To create a story and despite having very little in common with Trixie I related to her in a way that made everything too personal so that when the book was finished I felt broken.

The worst book hangover ever, but truly worth it.

tiger lily

tiger lily
jodi lynn anderson
ya/fantasy
harper teen
published 2012

Before Peter Pan belonged to Wendy, he belonged to the girl with the crow feather in her hair.... Tiger Lily.  When fifteen-year-old Tiger Lily meets the alluring teenage Peter Pan deep in the forbidden woods of Neverland, the two form a bond that's impossible to break, but also impossible to hold on to.  As the leader of the Lost Boys, the most fearsome of Neverland's inhabitants.  Peter is an unthinkable match for Tiger Lily.  However, when Wendy Darling, a girl who is everything Tiger Lily is not, arrives on the island, Tiger Lily discovers how far she is willing to go to keep Peter with her, and in Neverland.

The minute I saw this book I knew that I would love it.  Usually, when I see I cover I love I expect it will probably not stand up to my expectations, but this time I knew because it was Peter Pan.

Peter Pan has always secretly been my favorite of Disney movies.  And not because of Peter or Wendy, but Tinker Bell & Tiger Lily.  I thought Tiger Lily was beautiful in the cartoon movie.  I wanted to know her story and I wanted Peter to love only her.  I thought Wendy was bossy and silly and didn't deserve Peter.  Tinker Bell has just always been my favorite.  Feisty and animated.  She couldn't talk, but boy did you know how she felt.  Since then Tink has had her own series of movies and it's been so fun to see that world from her eyes, but still, the silent Tink holds a place in my heart.

Jodi Lynn Anderson has done an amazing job at making the story of Peter Pan the story of Tiger Lily and Tinker Bell.  She's weaved in bits of J.M. Barrie's tale into hers and reminded us of Disney's classic, but there is no humor and this is not a children's tale.

It is dark and dangerous.  And it feels real.  She took each and every character and made them as real as they could be living on an island almost impossible to reach by ship where hardly anyone grows old.  Captain Hook is desperate to catch Peter and in Disney's story I always wondered what would really happen if he did catch him.  In Anderson's tale I knew that when he did catch him Peter would die.  He isn't a bumbling captain to a ragtag group of pirates, but a madman looking not so much for treasure as much as he just wants to kill.  Smee isn't the sweet, reluctant pirate, but a dark and dangerous serial killer.

The tale is told from Tinker Bell's perspective as she has abandoned her own people to live with Tiger Lily whom she loves and admires but doesn't think knows she exists.  Able to read human's minds through their feelings she is the perfect storyteller.  The story is dark and beautiful and heartbreaking and I loved every word of it.

night film

night film
marisha pessl
fiction/mystery/thriller/horror
random house
published 2013

On a damp October night, beautiful young Ashley Cordova is found dead in an abandoned warehouse in lower Manhattan.  Though her death is ruled a suicide, veteran investigative journalist Scott McGrath suspects otherwise.  As he probes the strange circumstances surrounding Ashley's life and death, McGrath comes face-to-face with the legacy of her father: the legendary, reclusive cult-horror-film director Stanislas Cordova - a man who hasn't been seen in public for more than thirty years.

For McGrath, another death connected to this seemingly cursed family dynasty seems more than just a coincidence.  Though much has been written about Cordova's dark and unsettling films, very little is known about the man himself.

Driven by revenge, curiosity, and a need for the truth, McGrath, with the aid of two strangers, is drawn deeper and deeper into Cordova's eerie, hypnotic world.

The last time he got close to exposing the director, McGrath lost his marriage and his career.  This time he might lose even more.

I'm not sure what I was expecting when I picked up Night Film.  It was one of those books that I first saw in the emails the library send out of book recommendations.  I'd never heard of Marisha Pessl.  I'm not sure that her acclaimed first book Special Topics in Calamity Physics (despite being described as a murder mystery) is a book I would necessarily pick up and enjoy, but the synopsis of Night Film intrigued me.  Then reader friends began reading the book and saying only vague mysterious bits of praise.  So I got the book on my Kindle and promptly forgot about it.  When it came time to compile my TBR lists for 2014 I decided I would get down and read Night Film and see what all the fuss was about.

Although....you don't really hear too much.  It's not a mainstream book.  It's not side-by-side with the James Pattersons and John Grishams.  It didn't even hit the type of frenzy that The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo did.  It's odd.

Nonetheless, on to the review.  Reading Night Film was like experiencing A Clockwork Orange for the first time.  You're not entirely sure what's happening.  What is real and what is fantasy.  You're only sure that something is fucked up.  It reminded me of stories of Alfred Hitchcock.  I remember being pretty young and reading about Alfred Hitchcock giving a 6-year-old Melanie Griffith a wax doll replica of her mother Tippi Hedren in a wooden coffin as a Christmas or Birthday present.  It was the creepiest thing I'd ever heard of.  During the entire book I pictured Cordova as Hitchcock.  I spent much time wishing the movies Cordova made were real so I could run out and watch them.

And the book was terrifying in that you have no idea what's going on.  Like black and white horror movies where you don't actually see the monster eating the victim because it's off camera, but you know it's happening and somehow that's more terrifying than seeing it.  About two thirds into the book I was captivated by the insanity, worried I would have nightmares when I went to sleep.  (For the record I didn't, but I did read until 2 a.m.)

Of course there were things that bugged me.  If you've ever read my reviews of James Patterson books I hate unnecessary italics.  Marisha Pessl loves them.  They are everywhere and in the beginning I could barely get past it.  And then there were the obvious things that were happening that McGrath didn't pick up on.  Inez Gallo's nickname, the effects of the greenhouse & the repercussions of McGrath's missing research.  But I suppose with everything that was going on in McGrath's life at that moment things just got past him.

When I got to the rather abrupt ending it made mention of the Night Film app.  I wish it had mentioned that in the beginning so I didn't have to search through my ebook to find the places where I could interact with the app.  But I found the extra content to be kind of dull and cheap compared to the book.  The voice acting was awful and just ridiculous.  There is a 'diary' though that was quite a gem.

I'm not sure if this makes me a Pessl fan, but maybe someday if I see Special Topics in Calamity Physics at a used bookstore I might pick it up.

the spectacular now

the spectacular now
tim tharp
ya/contemporary
knopf
published 2008

Sutter Keely.  He's the guy you want at your party.  He'll get everyone dancing.  He'll get everyone in your parents' pool.  Okay, so he's not exactly a shining academic star.  He has no plans for college and will probably end up folding men's shirts for a living.  But there are plenty of ladies in town, and with the help of Dean Martin and Seagram's V.O., life's pretty fabuloso, actually.  Until the morning he wakes up on a random front lawn, and he meets Aimee.  Aimee's clueless.  Aimee is a social disaster.  Aimee needs help, and it's up to the Sutterman to show Aimee a splendiferous time and then let her go forth and prosper.  But Aimee's not like other girls, and before long he's in way over his head.  For the first time in his life, he has the power to make a difference in someone else's life - or ruin it forever.

Well.  That was depressing.

Sutter Keely is an alcoholic at 18.  There's no getting around that.  There is rarely a time during his narration that he is not inebriated.  There was rarely a time during his narration that I didn't want to punch him in the face.

I made the mistake of reading this as an adult.  One who still drinks, yes, but not one who drinks to excess pretty much ever anymore.  I forgot how I was in my 20s.  I forgot how I spent nearly every night for several years drunk.  How a good night was binge drinking with my friends and feeling like the only way we could have fun was if alcohol was somehow involved.  Work provided unlimited access to booze and we took full advantage of that.  I forgot what an asshole I was when I drank.  Not a mean drunk sort of asshole, but one who did stupid stuff and thought it was hilarious.

I know that had I stayed where I was during that time of my life I might not be alive today.

And I realize that the brilliance of Tim Tharp's novel is that the entire story is told from Sutter's point of view and you, the reader are (most likely) sober while reading it and so you can read between the lines.  We know Sutter isn't the life of the party.  We know he is being mocked.  We know he has no real friends because no one wants a friend like that.  We know that he's using Aimee just as he perceives everyone else in her life does.  So Sutter becomes this horribly pathetic character to us.

And there is a moment that we're all waiting for.  The afterschool special moment where something horrible happens that changes Sutter.  Makes him realize that he can't continue living his life this way.  And it happens, but not how we expected.  And it makes the story even more brilliant than originally thought.  Because not everyone has that afterschool special moment.  Not everyone realizes the error of their ways.  Some are lost and will always remain lost.  Some don't need that moment, they just sort of come to that realization themselves.

What Tim Tharp does is give us a big dose of reality.  This isn't a glossy YA novel that splits people into Team Sutter and Team Someone Else.  This is a PSA wrapped up in damn good writing.

ashes to ashes

ashes to ashes
kovac/liska #1
tami hoag
fiction/suspense/thriller/mystery
orion
published 1999

The newspapers have dubbed him the Cremator.  He has already claimed three lives and he won't stop there.  He has a plan for greatness, only this time there is a witness.  A teenage runaway with a dubious identity and a murky past, Angie DiMarco has seen the face of the killer in the flickering light of the funeral pyre.  Now the police have Angie, but Angie isn't talking.

While I've read a few Tami Hoag books I've kind had a hit or miss sort of luck with them.  I bought a bunch of her books after I read the first one I really liked, but then I read the one I didn't like and I wasn't too excited to start any other one.

But after years of sitting on my shelf I've decided to finally give them another shot. And I was pleasantly surprised.  Much better than the not so great one I read, but I didn't quite get into it the way I did the first one!

It was really long.  And for why, I'm not entirely sure.  There were moments that dragged on, musings that seemed to muse for too long.  But it was interesting enough to keep me entertained until the end.  I have the next book Dust to Dust which features Kovac & Liska who were a little more than background characters in Ashes to Ashes.

And while it was interesting it was slightly predictable.  I knew who the killer was and I figured out the connection between the killer and the witness, but still there were a few surprises that I won't spoil for you.  All in all it was a good read!

the name of the wind

the name of the wind
kingkiller chronicles #1
patrick rothfuss
fiction/high fantasy
daw
published 2007

The riveting first-person narrative of a young man who grows to be the most notorious magician his world has ever seen.  From his childhood in a troupe of traveling players to years spent as near-feral orphan in a crime-ridden city, to his daringly brazen yet successful bid to enter a legendary school of magic.

The Name of the Wind is one of those books that can be described as epic because that's really what it is, an epic.  Kvothe is an unassuming innkeeper at the Waystone Inn serving the very few patrons of farmers and the very infrequent traveler.  In the past few months the roads have become increasingly unsafe so Waystone Inn has not seen a new face in quite some time.  And that's mostly okay with Kvothe who just wants to polish his bottles and listen to stories that the villagers tell.

Until a battered and terrified regular comes in carrying a bundle of nightmares.  Now Kvothe knows that the quiet in his life might be coming to and end.  When he comes across a Chronicler he decides that now is the perfect time to tell the story of his life.

This book is what one might also describe as a brick.  The paperback that was lent to me is a cool 722.  It's no The Game of Thrones, but it's pretty long nonetheless.  It was recommended to me by a friend and has been sitting on my shelf for many, many months.  It took me awhile to get into the book at all.  I'm not a big fantasy reader, especially not these sort of epic high fantasy books (I just learned what the term high fantasy means!) so I was a little lost until I found the rhythm.  Then the pages seemed to fly by until I got to the last 20-30 pages.  Then it sort of slowed down.

Also called The Name of the Wind: Day One, the book is Kvothe's telling of the story of his life to the Chronicler while they are sitting in his deserted inn.  He takes us from his childhood days all the way through his teens.  I think by the time he takes a break for the day he is about 17 or 18 years old.

Kvothe is one of the luckiest and yet, unluckiest people ever.  He's arrogant, having discovered at a young age that he was scarily intelligent and apt at sympathy, a sort of alchemist/magician sort of thing.  And his high opinion of himself is generally what gets him into rough spots.  The book is packed with adventure, mystery and sadness and it ends with a sort of cliffhanger.  There is still so much story to tell!

If you're a reader of fantasy you've probably already read this.  If you're not you should definitely give it a try.  Fans of The Game of Thrones books will enjoy this as well.

reconstructing amelia

reconstructing amelia
kimberly mccreight
fiction/contemporary/mystery
harper collins
published 2013

Kate's in the middle of the biggest meeting of her career whens he gets the telephone call from Grace Hall, her daughter's exclusive private school in Park Slope, Brooklyn.  Amelia has been suspended, effective immediately, and Kate must come get her daughter - now.  But Kate's stress over leaving work quickly turns to panic when she arrives at the school and finds it surrounded by police officers, fire trucks, and an ambulance.  Bu then it's already too late for Amelia.  And for Kate.

An academic overachiever despondent over getting caught cheating has jumped to her death.  At least that's the story Grace Hall tells Kate.  And clouded as she is by her guilt and grief, it is the one she forces herself to believe.  Until she gets an anonymous text: She didn't jump.

A parent's worst nightmare is the death of their child way before their time.  I sit here thinking about Reconstructing Amelia and how I don't know what I would do.  Could I survive that?  Could I continue on as Kate had?

I would like to think that I would search for answers as she does.  That I would not rest until I knew exactly what happened to my child.  But then, when you find out what do you do with that information?

I expected the story for Kate's POV.  A single, working mother who despite her busy hours tries to make time for her daughter.  I didn't expect to see things through Amelia's perspective.  It's heartbreaking.  To know how Amelia felt about everything that was going on around her, how she truly felt about her mother and Kate would never really know.

Of course, spanning out around Amelia is the hot topic of bullying.  I always thought about how much more vicious girls can be than boys.  Never is that more true than in Reconstructing Amelia.

There is much about this book that hurts to read.  When Kate talks about not being able to remember what Amelia smelled like despite searching desperately on pillows she hadn't washed I started to cry.  I remember once hearing a man talking about dealing with the death of his young son.  He mentioned that he was down in the basement laundry room where he had kept a bag of his son's clothes that he never washed.  Every once in a while he would pull something out of that bag to just inhale, hoping to catch a whiff of that little boy smell.  Even now, thinking about that man I cry.  It's like the last physical manifestation of your child who is gone is there for a brief time after they have left and you find comfort in being able to hold onto this proof that they had actually existed.

This is not a book that leaves you feeling relived.  There is no happy ending.  The people who should be punished seem to skate away unscathed while Amelia is still gone.  I suppose, like most things in life, it's meant to be not fair.

Kimberly McCreight flutters flawlessly between Kate's voice and Amelia's.  Both are believable and smartly fleshed out.  Sometimes both do something that just seems nuts, but then you remember that sometimes you do things that are nuts.  Some parts of the mystery were obvious, but it didn't deter me from wanting to continue.

But the whole time I was reading I kept thinking, Amelia isn't coming back.  This bright, beautiful, loved young girl isn't getting her happy ending.  And that was hard.

farm fatale

farm fatale
wendy holden
fiction/brit chick lit
headline books publishing
published 2001

Cash-strapped Rosie and her boyfriend Mark are city folk longing for a country cottage.  Rampantly nouveaux-riches Samantha and Guy are also searching for rustic bliss - a mansion complete with all the fancy trappings.  The village of Eight Mile Bottom seems quiet enough, despite a nosy postman, a reclusive rock star, a glamorous Bond Girl, and a ghost with a knife in its back.  But there are unexpected thrills in the hills, and the two couples are soon swept up in various romantic entanglements, mix-ups, slip-ups, and unlikely seductions in their search for ever-greener pastures.

What to say....what to say.....

I didn't love this book, but then I didn't hate it either.  It was just....there.  Rosie wasn't that bad of a character, but I never really got a sense of who she really was.  I definitely got a sense of other characters.  Like Samantha and Mark.  Awful, awful people.  I don't understand at all why we were stuck in Samantha's head at all.  I kept waiting for the moment when something changes for Samantha, when she realizes she's a horrible person, but that never comes.  From the synopsis I was expecting a much different couple.  The story would have been just fine if she was never in it, albeit much shorter.

Everything kind of dragged on and then suddenly took this sharp turn and as the pages flipped away with very little pages left to read I wondered how things were going to get wrapped up.  Holden wrapped everything up in about 7 pages.  It was kind of disappointing.  And predictable.

I still have two other books by Wendy Holden to read for the off the shelf challenges.  Hopefully they'll be a little better than this one.  I'm generally a sucker for brit chick lit, but this one didn't thrill me.