UPS sucks giant balls

Last week I ordered party supplies for Emma’s birthday party.  She’s having two this year.  A combined one with her cousins who are all two weeks apart and another for just her preschool friends.

The party with family is a Knights & Princesses theme and Tori found a dragon pinata online at Party City.  Perfect!  The kids can slay the dragon!  I offered to order that and some princess plates and thank you notes.  Since I was ordering that stuff I went ahead and ordered the Strawberry Shortcake stuff for her friends party.

I knew the box would arrive today so all day I’ve been anxiously awaiting.  When we got home from preschool today I went searching in my office for something and I heard strange noises coming from the side yard.  The kids in the neighborhood have been breaking into our neighbor’s backyard so they can pick the oranges off our tree.  Echo barks like mad at them.  However, I didn’t hear barking though I could hear what sounding like someone climbing on the fence or shuffling around.  I peeked out the window and saw Strawberry Shortcake party supplies strewn everywhere.

WTF.

The asshole UPS guy put the box in our backyard.  With out giant dog.  Ignoring the sign on the fence door that says ‘Beware of Dog’.  And he had to have ignored the dog barking because she barks when someone gets even close to our backyard.

WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!?!?!

In my heightened hormonal state I do the only thing that comes to mind and call up Ray to cry and curse at the UPS man.

Then I got online and tried to find a number to contact UPS.  Did you know that it is literally impossible to speak to a human being on the phone who works for UPS?  Unless you have a friend who works for UPS and you call them at home.  I’m not exaggerating.  There is no option to speak to an operator or customer service.  You can track packages, schedule a pick up or buy supplies, but you cannot speak to a human.

So I file a claim online.  Four times because each time I finish the form and hit submit I get an error message that the process is temporarily unavailable.  Plus, I can only enter in 3 damaged items and I have so much more than that.

Emma took the news rather well.  She followed me outside to retrieve the box pretty happily.  When she saw the damage she exclaimed ‘My Strawberry Shortcake party!  Oh no!.  Maybe getting a dog wasn’t such a good idea. I don’t think it was such a good idea to give the box to Echo.’

No baby, it wasn’t.